The Bottom Half of the Internet Speaks - Bubba Watson

Prior to the 2016 Waste Management Phoenix Open Bubba Watson made comments that he would rather not be playing in the event at TPC Scottsdale.

When asked why he liked the course he said, "I don't like it. I'm not going to PC it. I don't like it at all. I just mentioned why I'm here. I've got three beautiful sponsors that love it here."

Unsurprisingly these words did not make Bubba particularly popular with the fans at the event, including the vast number of fans (around 15,000) around the par three 16th. When Bubba reached this hole he was booed and suddenly remembered to clarify it was just the courses he hated and definitely not the fans. The whole incident created a huge amount of action in the comments sections of the internet. Some people were angry with Bubba, some with the fans, and some with each other. I have taken this anger and turned it into something much greater; the following found poem.

I like people who speak their minds,
And Bubba does that!
He is a credit to every player,
He made golf fun and exciting.

How can you not love Bubba?
Concisely,
Because he's the biggest whiner in golf,
Bigger even than Colin Montgomerie

He doesn't want to kill the goose that lays gold,
It's too bad sponsors don't cut off these idiots,
They're just SPOILED BRATS,
This is the last PING product I buy.

My grandma told me if I didn't have something nice to say don't say it,
And he sounds ungrateful, arrogant, and petulant.
Apparently you didn't say anything nice either.
Sorry Granny.

It's a drunkfest,
Nothing more,
But plenty less,
It is an embarrassment to the tour and the players.

If he didn't like it then shut up,
Maybe he ought to try a real job,
I'd take his job.
If he actually had to work for a living he would starve.

Bubba's problem is,
In my honest opinion,
In his heart of hearts,
He is a snob

This tournament's fans are the most ignorant on the PGA Tour,
And usually the most inebriated.
Phoenix isn't the only place with drunk fans,
It just has more of them.

Guess what,
If you don't like the tournament,
Don't watch it.
It raises a lot of money for charity.

Booing?
At a golf tournament?
Because of giving his opinion?
These "fans" need to go back to their martinis and shut up.